Speech is one of the most complex events to attend. It’s really hard to explain what it’s like, but I’m going to try!
I’ll be doing a couple of speech blogs over the next couple weeks to kind of invite people into this crazy world that I love.
For the first part I will be informing you about the type of kids you’ll see at a speech tournament.
Every kid is different. You learn that from coaching. You just hope that you can help them become better. Because that’s what you’re getting paid to do.
No one is there to see anyone fail. But I can’t lie it is more entertaining to have a few surprises!
The Over Confident But Really Bad Kid
This kid probably is very talented…at something. However I appreciate your confidence and I hope one day they will learn to channel it in the right way.
Speaking in front of people is never easy. But damn I feel bad for the kids whose nerves are so bad that they have to vomit.
The Screamer (Remember yelling is not an emotion!)
Why are you yelling at me? I’m literally sitting right here! Instead of screaming in my face why don’t you try other levels? Learn subtlety…
The One That Blows You Away
You feel bad because they were so good that you have a hard time finding something to write down. Then you feel even worse when you try to suggest…like all of a sudden I have no idea what I’m doing.
The One That Doesn’t Try
The only thing this kid is doing is ensuring that the other kids in their round score above them. It’s nice but you’re wasting everyone’s time.
The Kid Who Looks Like He Got Dressed In The Dark
Seriously what happened? Did you sleep in your outfit? Did your coach not tell you presentation matters? Your mother let you leave the house like that?
Yes you do well but seriously kid relax. There is such a thing as over pronunciation.
The What Just Happened Kid
Seriously please explain!!! I don’t know what I heard…I don’t know what I saw…it was just…..
The One You Laugh At Not With
It’s so hard sometimes to be a human. Especially when judging people and something weird happens and a laugh comes out. Sorry kids I’m human!
The Nervous Wreck
Relax! It’ll all be over soon but it’s hard to accomplish anything when you can only concentrate on how nervous you are!
The No Show
When they talk about the delay in the tournament…they’re talking about you. It’s not that difficult of a schedule that you can’t be where you’re supposed to be.
The Late Arrival
Sometimes you’re late because you’re in another event. That’s fine! But to those kids who are late because you don’t have the respect to be on time…it’s obvious…be on time!
They get one sentence out and they’re running out the damn door! I applaud anyone who tries I really do. I hope one day they get the courage to finish their speech.
I have no idea what you’re saying. I would have to put my ear up to your mouth to know your speech.
The Illness Faker
The easiest thing in the world to do when you don’t know your piece is to fake being sick. You might even get a sympathy point out of it. Not from me though….
The Unorganized Kid
This kid will ask you, the judge, to borrow a pen. All of their papers will come back with mistakes and wrinkled. You had them for two minutes! They need to get their whole life together!
I get it…you think you’re great! I believe that you can actually be great if you stop over acting. When the only level you have is over-dramatic…well that doesn’t help you! Reign it in, find an emotional connection to your piece and deliver it.
The difference between this person and the overachiever is that the perfectionist leaves no margin for error. But man when you see them make a mistake it’s like waiting for a robots head to explode! You can see them notice that a mistake was made and it’s so delicious to watch.
The Question Is Which One Are You?
Now please enjoy some Britney Spears gifs that represent how I look judging a speech tournament:
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