Shhh! It’s Gossip! Week 1

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Justin Timberlake came out with a new song. It’s a shame after taking time off for his acting career that he would come out with a song as bad as his acting career.


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Justin Bieber Instagramed a picture of his ass. Every twitter follower creams themselves with delight.

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American Idol is back! Someone forgot to inform Ryan Seacrests stylist, he looks like he’s going out for a cocktail in boystown and not like the host of a television show.

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Octomom wins best celebrity sex tape. As the only ‘celebrity’ entry she was pretty much a lock for the award.

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Lena Dunham said ‘I’m not super-thin, but I’m thin for, like, Detroit’. Causing the people of Detroit to say ‘na uh’ and eat their feelings.

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Lindsay Lohan rejected a plea deal that would send her to rehab instead of jail. Because in jail she would get free room service and rehab she would actually have to do things.

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Mark Salling of Glee was accused of a sexual battery for fucking a girl without a condom. I’m betting she hopes there will be a settlement, if she really wanted money she should have tried harder to get pregnant.

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The son of the woman who created Barney was arrested for attempted murder, sounds to me like someone needs to start watching Barney to learn how to love.

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Charlie Sheen announced his stance on gun control on Piers Morgan. Thank god! I’ve been on the edge of my seat waiting for Charlie’s opinion on this.

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Barrack Obama is rolling out new policies in his second term. Michelle Obama is rocking government issued bangs to celebrate.

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Zac Efron was photographed next to glowing dildo’s filming a scene for a new movie. He asked the photog to not release the picture because he has so many young fans. 1. Your young fans probably won’t be seeing a movie with a dildo scene in it 2. We ALL know why you don’t want people to see you shopping for dildos 😉

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It was recently discovered that Subway’s subs are actually only 11 inches. So if I order a 6 inch am I getting a 6 inch? Or a 5.5 inch? Size matters!

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Dear Abby passed away at the age of 92. Finally now Jesus has someone to ask about his daddy issues.

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Lance Armstrong has now been stripped of his bronze medal from the 2000 Olympics. ‘What more can they take from me’ said Lance. I believe he still has one ball they may want.

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Kara DioGuardi is expecting her first child. Who?

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